mmmm
such a long time have not been here...i just cant...but now i've a little strength that i gain inside me for now...yeahh life has to go on no matter what had happened..n things cant turn back like before..
keeping my self moving is the hardest thing to do in these 3months period...its hard, difficult n being so down that anyone could not feel and understand..
hmm..before i had a good, comfortable life and i was supposed to make lots of money (yeah money never enuff hehehehe), travel all over the world and write deep, meaningful words, notes that would express my wonder on the workings of the world..and published volumes of short stories inspired by the people i meet and i care and love on my life journey..
and im being shocked with the news that im not expecting at all in my entire life...that was the killing news...automatically i felt im losing my strength and im not so strong all of sudden...first in my mind at that time came out my children n my long love that i kept for so long in me..what would they feel?..how are they going to take it?...but i know god is always with me to guide me to the path that he given...
but sometimes we are just human with feelings that we sometimes could not hide it..i was a paradoxical wreck, but to the untrained eyes i was calm, controlled and though as an fox (konon laaa)...huhuhuhu
surviving it is miraculous, but to be what you onve were...that call for another miracle...a week may not seem much of a wait to anybody else but to me now..they are days worth counting...
